The COVID-19 Pandemic has changed our world in so many ways. It has brought tremendous lows but also some unexpected highs. Case in point, for my family, it has been what I like to call “excessive togetherness.” I don’t know about your family but never before have I experienced so much family time. We are together ALL THE TIME! This has put all of our relationships under a magnifying glass. One, in particular, has been the relationship my daughters have with each other. It has been delightful to observe how much they love each other and then, 15 seconds later, cringeworthy. Sound familiar?

Many of us began this year with very different plans and visions for ourselves than what has played out. We may have dreamt of travel, a new job, meeting new friends, or improving our health and well-being. Instead, we are met with isolation, confinement, limited opportunities, and constant concern for the health of ourselves and our loved ones.

Thanks for following through this series of talking to kids about race. If you’re just joining us, we encourage you to check out some of our earlier posts about how to talk with toddlers and elementary aged children about anti-racism, equity, and inclusion.

Today, we’re talking about adolescents. Though we’ve talked about the importance of raising anti-racist humans from birth, it’s never too late to start incorporating more diversity into your family’s home, media consumption, and conversations. As Maya Angelou once said, “You do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” Adolescents are experiencing a “remodel” in their brains, doing away with old, useless information, and strengthening their beliefs and ideals that are most enforced, so now is a great time to start or continue this work (1). The young brain is truly magical… even though the sometimes sour moods and slammed doors are not!

There’s something magical about being near the ocean. Between the calming waves splashing against one another to the soft sand beneath my toes, the ocean has always provided me a calming and healing experience. However, it’s more than a cliche as sand has been proven to calm your nervous system and relax your body, which is exactly why sand makes for a great healing modality.

This blog is the second in a series designed for parents to more easily approach the topic of race, bias, and racism with their children. Much of the language and resources in the Birth to Pre-K blog is also appropriate for Kinder and 1st graders and is generally foundational to this post. Please check it out!

One of the most impactful and beneficial things parents can do for their child is to spend regular and intentional one-on-one time with them. Spending one-on-one time with your child will:

• Increase closeness and warmth between you and your child

• Strengthen the parent-child relationship

• Give your child positive parental attention

• Make your child feel important to you

• Increase your child’s self-esteem

• Decrease negative attention-seeking behaviors

• Give your child space to talk to you about things that may be hard to talk about in other settings

• Allow you to tune in to their world

Life is full of consequences. In fact, some would argue that consequences (or the fear of them) drive our behavior. As parents, we deal with consequences in spades. Your toddler throws their cup on the ground (for the millionth time!), your teen refuses to get off their phone during dinner, your five-year-old hits their younger sibling when they are arguing. Then what? What’s your next move as a parent? Do you yell? Do you “come down hard” and be authoritarian? Do you let it slide and “lose the battle to win the war?”

Here you are, the parent of a preschooler or an even younger child. Maybe you are a first-time parent. Maybe you are a parenting pro. No matter, you are questioning how you’re going to begin a conversation, one that you know you should have and might not know how to start, or what is appropriate for the developmental level of your child. A conversation about race.